Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Tropical storm and hurricane, oh my!

All eyes are on Hurricane Earl here in NC. We're currently under a tropical storm watch so things are about to become mass chaos! We don't want him to come here, and I hate to say this but, we're overdue for a storm. I think we're ready. Right now it looks like it will just brush the coast but if things change we may have to board up the sliding glass doors and a few windows because the winds are so strong. Tommy will have to work and he'll have to stay at the office during the storm. Bailey and I will head over to my parents until it passes.

I really hope it steers clear of here! The kids at school were crazy today and already wondering if we'll have school on Friday! I told them they better not wish that too much because we'll have to make it up.

So there's my distraction for this week! Stay away Earl!

Sunday, August 29, 2010

Lost in translation?

Do you ever get that feeling that you're an outsider who's looking in? Or maybe share something with someone but they either didn't get what you were saying or they just chose to overlook it and move on/do their own thing? I'm sitting here right now with a full mind, lots of stuff swirling around inside. This "lost" feeling is strange and it's been bothering me for a few weeks now (and it has nothing to do with the adoption). I feel like sometimes people put on this facade that they're something better, more experienced, or can do things better than you mentality but in reality they're swimming along just like all of the rest of us trying to find their way, just not strong enough to admit it. I hate when people try to express a thought and then that thought gets twisted or they then look at you like you're the one who's done something wrong. I can see why there are so many people who have a hard time trusting. I know most of this makes no sense and it's a bunch of rambled/jumbled thoughts but I needed to get it out. I'm so thankful I have a husband that listens and understands and gives thoughtful advice. Sometimes I feel like it's us vs. the world, in more ways than one :) Together we make a great team!

Ok, so enough of that--my own little vent session :) School is going really well. I've already been observed and had a good response from that. My students (aka "my kids") remember a lot from last year so we've been able to use more Spanish in class which has been fun. They told me on Friday that I was a "gum sniper" because I can usually always catch them (probably because I'm such an avid gum chewer) :) The only downfall is having to get back into the getting up early routine!

We have had a great weekend. We did some major cleaning yesterday and last night for dinner we grilled shrimp and bacon wrapped scallops. I can't even begin to tell you how good it was. My best friend joined us and she was impressed too! Tommy said Chef Ramsey had nothing on him! The weekends always go by so fast. This week we'll have to watch the weather because of Hurricane Earl. Looks like he may be close to here.

Monday, August 23, 2010

Just when you think you're over it

Well I thought I was over "it." The "it" being that down feeling you get when something happens to someone that you really want to happen to you. Not so much as in being pregnant, because I honestly believe I'm over that, but the becoming a Mom part. I found out yesterday that an old high school friend is pregnant. We don't talk anymore so it's not like she's even a close friend. I think what bothered me the most about it is I remember when she got married and how "anti-kid" she was (and from what I had heard still pretty much was). I think it caught me more off guard than anything else. I honestly haven't felt this way in a long time. I really am happy for the people around me that have children/are having children. I guess it's the whole story with her that made me think, great why not me?! I had a long prayer time in church yesterday to get myself back because let's face it, it's not healthy nor is it good to feel that way. So I picked myself up and enjoyed the rest of my day!

We had a great weekend. Well, I did. Poor Tommy had to work most of the weekend to fix some problems they had due to that bad thunderstorm we had at the end of the week. We did go shrimping again on Friday night with one of Tommy's coworkers. It was a lot of fun. We even brought the "bubble boxes" and a bucket and caught some "critters" for our saltwater tanks at school. I have 3 baby flounders and 2 Atlantic Lookdowns. I think they were pretty happy to get out of the buckets and into the tanks this morning.

So far school is going really well. The first couple of weeks are always busy with extra events at night so I'll be glad when those are behind us. Hope everyone is having a Happy Monday!

Thursday, August 19, 2010

Great day!

Today's first day went great! The kids seem to be super sweet but boy am I tired! My 7th graders were pretty shy. In one class I even tried to joke with them to break the ice but they didn't get it. I could hear the crickets chirping, ha ha! Oh well maybe tomorrow! Many of them thanked me as they left my room which is great to hear. One of my new students was pretty upset that his mom had put each classes materials in plastic grocery bags and labeled them. He was already frazzled because everything is new but I think it made him feel awkward because everyone else had all of their stuff in one big (messy) pile. I helped him carry all of his "bags" to his locker. I told him we could take them out if he wanted but he decided to keep them in there. I noticed when he came to class, he had ditched the bag :) So there's one of today's school stories for you!

We also had a HUGE thunderstorm at the end of school today, probably the worst one we've had all summer. It usually happens every year on the first day. The lightening was so bad we ended up having to keep all of the kids inside, 20 minutes past the time they were supposed to get out. So that made for an interesting dismissal time!

On the adoption front, our social worker emailed us back today! She said that I could "bother" her anytime, so that was nice to hear :) She said they had just finished up the second round of meetings for new potential adoptive parents. She also said another one of her family's were matched with a baby due next month. As for us, this is what she said "I do know I have gotten good feedback from your profile book and several birthmothers have given you very serious consideration." She said some have decided to parent and others chose another family, she doesn't know why but we all believe those were just not the babies God had in mind for us. I'm just glad to know there's been some activity and our profile book isn't just sitting on a desk collecting dust.

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Ready or not here they come!

Tomorrow is the first day of school for students! Yikes! I can't believe it's already time. I'm ready though! At least when the students are there the day goes by a lot faster, plus they are always there for a good story or two :) Tomorrow will also be my first day of actually "getting" up out of bed early.....I'm so not looking forward to that!

This week my mind has been consumed with adoption things. I have no idea why, well a few ideas, but it's strange that it would hit now. Everyone has been asking about news from the adoption front so maybe that's it. I really don't mind them asking. It's nice to know they're thinking about us and I know they want it to happen for us too. I also had a very vivid dream the other night about a baby so maybe that's what is adding to this. So, I ended up emailing our social worker on Sunday night. We haven't heard back from her yet. Normally she's really good with emailing back right away so I assume she's out of town or something else is going on.

I think it's that feeling of the unknown that keeps you wondering. Hopefully she'll be able to tell us something, it doesn't have to even be specific to us, but just something that will help ease this feeling right now. But for now, I'll have lots to occupy my time with and even though my students are middle schoolers, they still like the support from us.

I read this yesterday. "Peace is the ability to remain faithful in spite of the panic of unfulfilled dreams." "The Lord will fulfill His purpose for me; your love, O Lord, endures forever-do not abandon the works of your hands." Psalm 138:8

Saturday, August 14, 2010

Busy, busy

Well I've been back at work for 2 days and I'm already ready for a vacation :) Ha ha, just kidding--well maybe not really :) The first two days back have been really good. It's nice to catch up with my fellow coworkers and find out what everyone did over the summer. I still can't believe it's over.

I have 86 students this year (don't forget I teach middle school so they change classes). I *think* they are going to be a great group. It's hard to believe they'll be coming back to class on Thursday. Hope I'm ready by then :)

So we are 3 days shy of hitting the 6 month mark of waiting. A half a year already. In many ways it's hard to believe we've been waiting that long; in other ways it feels like it's been an eternity (especially if you consider we started this journey of trying to have a family almost 4 years ago). I've been praying we'll hear something, even if it's just an update soon. I don't like that part about it but that's the way our agency works and there's not really anything I can do about it---except annoy my social worker and that's probably not the best thing to do!

Tommy had a good check-up with the heart doctors on Tuesday so we are very thankful that things are going so well right now. Now we are on a major mission to keep losing weight! Hopefully we'll be able to stick to it.

Hope everyone is having a great weekend!

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

New beginnings

Well today is it. The last official day of my summer vacation (insert a very sad girl here) :) I can't believe it's over. This has to be one of the fastest summers I have had in a long time! The good news about that is that I haven't driven myself crazy thinking about the adoption. I've even refrained from emailing our social worker this month. Last summer we were busy making sure all of the paperwork was complete and waiting to hear on approvals from our applications. The summer before that we were totally involved with the IVF and then the miscarriage. This summer was just about having fun! I really think I needed it. I've gotten to spend time with our amazing friends, go to the beach, sleep in (oh how I will miss that one), shop, and travel. That's probably why the summer has felt so short.

But a new school year brings a new beginning. I'm able to start all over again. I teach 7th and 8th graders. Half of the 8th grade I taught last year so I already know them (I know almost all of them because our school is so small). The one great thing about the beginning of the school year is reconnecting with those kids and having the opportunity to start fresh, not just me but them as well.

Who knows what this year will bring! Of course I'm praying my heart out that I won't be able to finish the year out because we'll be bringing home a baby, but that's not in my hands either. So for now I'll just keep on keeping on! Here's to the 2010-2011 year! **You guys will be in for a treat once school starts back and I have middle school drama to share with you!

Friday, August 6, 2010

How things change!

This time of year always brings a bag of mixed emotions with it. The summer is coming to an end and I'm getting ready to go back to work. No more sleeping in and running errands during the day! But, it's this time of year that takes me back to 2008. Dreams and hopes were high and things were changing rapidly in our lives. I was pregnant. Our first attempt at IVF had been successful, even though we didn't think it had. I was slowly riding the roller coaster back up the hill. Still very guarded because we weren't sure what was going on. My numbers were low but slowly rising. Things seemed to be looking up, we just thought we were going to be parents. But, God had other plans.

Two years ago, we found out we were pregnant and a few short weeks later, we found out our babies were returning to heaven. It was one of the hardest and darkest times of my life. But I held on tight to what God would have in store for us. Looking back now, I'm thankful for all the experiences we've been through. Was it hard, yes; do I wish those babies were here with us now, of course. But God's plans are bigger than what we can ever dream of. I know He had us go through that for a reason and I know in the end it's made us stronger, rely on Him more, and hold on to our seats at what's to come.

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Fun times!

We've had a great time over the past two weeks. From our little getaway to Myrtle Beach and then a great visit with our good friends K and D from Florida, it's been the perfect ending to a great summer!

Sometimes these distractions are great, especially when waiting! It gets your mind off of things and really lets you enjoy life and all of the blessings we have been given. K and D are also waiting to adopt domestically so it's nice to have some friends to walk alongside us in this journey. As we were walking on Saturday, we were talking about how God works and how He's placed all of us doing things and it's by no mistake. Tommy and I are active in a new church plant. It's by no mistake He's placed us there. They don't know it (well they will now) but keeping us busy with set-up and outreach projects has really helped us. Not only have we grown and seen how blessed we really are but it has also helped to keep us busy doing work for our Savior. There's no greater work than that!

So without further ado, here are some fun pictures of our latest adventures.

The water park Tommy and I visited in Myrtle Beach. I guess the lifeguard was afraid she'd get wet! Good thing we weren't drowning :)

Lazy river riding!

Dinner at a Brazilian steakhouse

Our very musically talented friends, K and D. What a blessing they are to us!