It's been too long

I can't believe my last post was in July!  It's been way too long and my hope is that I will have some time to sit down and write some entries this year.  What an eventful year 2013 turned out to be!  I'll give a recap here and then I'll feel like I can move on :)

We really had a great summer.  We didn't do anything major, just hung out around here.  It's a great plus when you live at the beach.  Garrett still went to school two days a week but we enjoyed our time together.  Garrett and I spent our last "free" weekend with a trip to Charleston with my mom and sister. We had a great time.  We saw the sights, shopped, ate good food, and even rode on a trolley-which he didn't like at the time but now wants to ride again!  Ahh, the life of a two year old :)  We hosted a huge 40th birthday party for my brother in law complete with an inflatable waterslide which all of the kids (and adults) loved.  It was a great summer!

Tommy has had some hiccups if you will with his heart health.  He was out of normal rhythm too many times over the first part of the year which led to 3 cardioversions.  We were basically visiting the hospital every other month.  His doctor here suggested that we go back to Duke to meet with a doctor about the possibility of having another ablation surgery; this is the same surgery he had in 2009.  We met with him in August and he felt like Tommy was a candidate for a repeat ablation.  He said sometimes those areas heal back and start causing the irregular rhythms again and then it could be coming from the condition of his heart.  His schedule was pretty booked so the first slot he had open would be sometime in late September/early October.  They finally scheduled him for October.  He had an appointment with his local doctor on September 17th, he was and had been out of rhythm this whole time, and his doctor suggested going ahead and doing another cardioversion so it wouldn't be so with him being out of rhythm.  Wouldn't you know it, later that afternoon Tommy called me and said Duke called, there's an opening this Friday for the ablation.  We quickly got things together, made sure my parents could keep Garrett for us and made our way to Duke on September 18th.  They ran a bunch of tests on Thursday and then he had the ablation surgery on Friday, September 20th.  The surgery lasted 10 hours but the doctor felt confident that they had gotten most of the areas.  He was afraid Tommy may go back into an irregular rhythm overnight because of the irritation in his heart but he didn't.  He stayed in a normal rhythm for about 2 weeks and then went out again.  He had another cardioversion in October and so far, everything  has been good since then.  Hopefully it was from all of the inflammation on his heart that caused that one.  We've been back for check-ups and they are pleased with everything.  We feel he is with a great team of doctors and feel confident in their decisions.  He's being seen by a heart failure/transplant doctor and an adult congenital doctor at Duke.  They did run a test on him in November and his numbers are pretty low; these are the numbers they look at when considering heart transplant.  But like the doctor there said, we don't know how long his numbers  have looked like that because he's never had this test.  We're just praying everything levels out because we don't want to face a transplant anytime soon (hearts only last about 10 years).

Garrett continues to be the light of our lives and keeps us busy and tired :)  He doesn't forget a thing and I love having conversations with him.  It's so funny the things he comes up with.  We took a trip to the mountains in October and he got to experience his first train ride.  We went with family and it was a great time.  We also stopped by the apple orchard on the way home and he loved that as well.

The holidays were also fun for us this year.  We hosted everyone for Thanksgiving and Garrett loved entertaining everyone.  He loved Christmas this year and he's starting to understand everything behind it.  It's such a neat experience to view it from a child's perspective.  He's totally amped up now for his birthday.  We've been hearing about the "birthday party" for weeks now.

We still haven't pursued anything else on the adoption front.  While we would love for Garrett to have a sibling, we want Tommy's health to be ok first.  Plus, I don't want to add any extra pressure on him about it---that's the last thing he needs right now.  I have moments where I really want to have another child but we truly are enjoying our time with Garrett.  I've talked to some of the parents whose kids I've taught over the years that are only children and they've given me some great advice on how to help him be a well rounded child.

We are excited to see how God is going to use us this year!

1 year ago today

We received "the call" that would forever change our lives! I feel so blessed today and so thankful that we were chosen to be Garrett's parents. I am thankful that his birthmother chose life and chose an adoption plan for him. She will always have a special place in my heart because I will never be able to understand or comprehend what she has gone through. It's hard to believe it's already been a year. In two weeks our sweet boy will be 1! I can't even believe it. God has been an continues to be so good to our family!

He's not the "lucky" one, we are!

Finally!!!!!!

After several phone calls this week to various people.....in our mailbox yesterday was Garrett's social security number! Yippee! I really can't believe it's taken this long. We received our adoption decree in the beginning of July, got his birth certificate on October 3rd, and it's taken 2 months to get the actual number (we applied for the number on the same day we got the birth certificate). Wow! My plan is to write to our governor, representatives etc and let them know about our experience and that honestly something needs to be done about this to change things. You wouldn't even believe how one of the "workers" talked to me over the phone. This is a big deal for us because we need that for filling out our taxes. I really did not want to have to go through the hoops of applying for a tax ID number for him. So I'm thankful that this was finally processed. Funny story--when I called Raleigh this week to check on things......they began to tell me that the paperwork was never processed, meaning they couldn't "find him." Um are you kidding me?!?! Then I spoke with 2 other people along with the local office here and finally found out that everything had been processed (that day mind you)...hmmmmm I'm just glad we have it!

On other exciting news, Tommy and I have been chosen to be a "mentor family" with Bethany (our agency). So we have been "assigned" our first couple (they are getting ready to start their homestudy). We're really excited to be able to pray with them through this journey and hopefully answer questions that they may have along the way.

Busy, busy-10 months

We stay so busy around here! Whew! I think things are finally beginning to slow down. Garrett turns 10 months old tomorrow?!?! Seriously, where has this year gone? If only time would have gone this fast during the wait, ha ha :) He continues to be such a blessing to us and we are so thankful that we have the privilege of raising him.

This week my heart melted just a bit more as he began to say the most precious word ever...."mama" :) He's been saying "dada" for a few months now and my Grandmother would tell me that he would say mama during the day but I wasn't a believer until I heard it for myself. He's also mimicking sounds that we make and it's really cute. He loves to laugh and he LOVES to eat! The doctor gave us the go ahead to start giving him meat at the end of last month and he loves it. He hasn't turned away anything yet (even turnips) and I hope that continues. We've got him on a breakfast, lunch, and dinner schedule now so that when we drop the formula in a couple of months, he'll be ready to go.

Speaking of going....he's trying to walk. He will cruise all around holding on to furniture, our legs, Bailey (dog), and anything else he can grab. Then he started letting go and would take a few steps then fall. This week he made it across the living room (laughing all the way)---I think we're in trouble :) The poor Christmas tree won't know what it's in for :)

We are also still waiting on his social security number. I have to remind myself that I really do love NC. They told us it would take "up to" 4 weeks. It's almost been 2 months. Ugh. I've called and the hold up seems to be that Raleigh has to "verify" that the actual birth certificate is legit. (again this would be why our state taxes are so much) Once this is over with I plan on writing a letter to our representatives, senators, and governor about this part of the paperwork process. I understand being thorough but really.....

Here are some pictures of my sweet boy!

I love this serious look on his face!

Mission accomplished

To add to an even more exciting week, we've all been sick around here! I thought I was feeling better from last week and then I came down with an awful sore throat on Sunday. I ended up going to the doctor on Monday and things are much better now! Poor Garrett's had a head cold but he's on the mend too, thank goodness!

We drove to Raleigh on Monday and got the birth certificate! It only took about 10 minutes, go figure! I don't know why they don't do that in the first place and then mail them. But anyways, we have it now! For my NC friends that go this route, they do charge a $15 fee to have it expedited, a $15 adoption fee, and $24 for the birth certificate ($15 for extra certified copies). We did go to babies r us while we were there and we met Tommy's brother for lunch so it was nice.

When we got back into town, we decided to go by the social security office to apply for Garrett's social security number. I tried doing this back in the summer but they told me I needed the birth certificate in order to apply for one. As I hand the application to the guy, along with the birth certificate, he says--we don't have to have the birth certificate--we can't use that as proof. I asked if he was kidding?! So good thing I had brought along the immunization record and the adoption decree (the same things I had before). He processed everything and said we should get it within a month, maybe even sooner.

So hopefully we're finished for now :) I never knew what an adventure this part would be!

Our great state

Time sure does seem to be flying by these days and I know I've not been the greatest at commenting or writing posts for that matter! Tommy and I were talking last night about how the weekends really seem to fly by now! He said it's because we're busy in a different way now. But I wouldn't change it for anything.

It seems like so many things have happened since the last update so here's my attempt to remember them all plus give you all the insight on trying to obtain a birth certificate from the great state of NC.

All about Garrett :) He now has 5 teeth! They seem like they are popping up everywhere (3 on the bottom and 2 on the top). He's really been a champ through this whole teething process. He is crawling everywhere and getting into everything he can touch :) He's also pulling himself up on things and just this past week he started letting go. He can stand for a few seconds and then falls, which he thinks is funny. Two weeks ago he received his first black eye courtesy of the entertainment center. He hit it just right and had a little bruise on his cheek which then turned into a black eye. Last week we got called out of church because he had fallen and they wanted us to see the little scratch on his arm (I'm really thankful they do this and let us know what is going on in there). Come to find out, he was "chasing" a little girl in the room and he slipped on his jeans that are too long :) Tommy told him once we got in the car that girls will you get you into trouble every time, ha ha!

He loves to talk. He is always making noises and babbling. He says dada all of the time now and we've heard a couple of mama's from him lately. That will melt your heart every time you hear it.

On the birth certificate front--We finally received our letter from social services saying that the adoption had been indexed and we could now apply for his birth certificate. Now I must say that our state is definitely lacking in this department. If you talk to 6 different people, you'll get 6 different answers. I fortunately talked with a lady who seemed to know what was going on during the summer and she told me that once we got the letter, to call back and make an appointment. You see supposedly our state is on a "critical backlog" (their words not mine) of creating certificates (birth, death, marriage etc). If you fill out the application and mail it in, it could take up to a year to get it back (are you serious)!! You can pay to expedite it but that will still take a few months. However, you can drive to Raleigh, and pick one up same day. It makes absolutely no sense to me but that's how things go here. It has taken us 3 months to get the letter saying we can now apply for the birth certificate since we received the adoption decree. As soon as I saw the letter on Tuesday, I started calling. One lady told me I couldn't get it yet (ugh) then she connected me with the "adoption department" and I left a message. I then called back because I knew she didn't know what she was talking about. I talked to another lady who said she would connect me with the lady in charge of adoptions. I left her a message and she called me back within 10 minutes. She took down the information (at this point it was 5:00) and told me the office was closed now but she would have someone call me back the next day to schedule an appointment. They told us if you drive up to pick it up on the same day you should call and make an appointment. I ended up having to call them back on Thursday and the lady said, I'm pretty booked the next few weeks but I have Monday or Tuesday. No problem, we'll take Monday! So tomorrow we had to the state capital to pick up that treasured piece of paper. The humorous part in all of this, the cost. Here's the breakdown- $15 (expedite fee); $15 (adoption fee--really?); and $24 (birth certificate); extra copies $15....... Gotta love NC :)

So hopefully things will go as planned tomorrow and we can come home and then apply for a social security number. Whew!

Party and photos!

The party went great this past weekend! We had about 55 family and friends join us to celebrate the finalization on Garrett's adoption. I'm so glad that we had so many to come and support us and love on him! I'll have to write more in an update later on but wanted to share some pictures. I know it's been a while :) Oh, and we almost have a crawler! I can't believe it! I think we are going to be in trouble :)

A boy and his dog :) I'm so glad they get along so well! I don't think Bailey knows what she's in for!

How can you not just love this face! Our little chief!

At the party with his Aunt D

The cake looked like his invitation

Family picture at the party

The tree we had everyone sign and stamp their thumbprint
Oops, a little late on this one :)

What? I'm not supposed to be messing with the camera bag

Finalization

I thought I'd tell you about what is to come in these upcoming days regarding the finalization of our adoption. I thought I *knew* what was going to happen but I didn't :)

In NC you don't have to go before a judge to have everything signed. Actually it's not even an option. They sign the paperwork and send you a copy. A few people have asked if it was a certificate or something....nope :) Just a very formal 2 page paper that states that biological parental rights have been terminated and we are the official forever family to this sweet boy. It's stamped with the seal and the judge signs it. That's it; it's funny because that's all that came in the mail--not even a paper that says "here's what you should do next."

We are very eager to get the birth certificate for one reason.....Tommy wants to buy Garrett a lifetime hunting and fishing license. Here, if you buy one before they turn 1 it costs around 200 and they are set for life. If you wait, it's upwards of 800. I know not the typical reason for wanting a birth certificate.

So, what happens now. Well I was told I could *possibly* get his social security number with just the adoption decree (it says his birthdate etc). So the next day I go be bopping down to the social security office to try to get his number. No can do! The lady who helped me was really nice but she told me that she'd have to have the birth certificate to verify the birth (the adoption decree that had that on there with a judge's signature wasn't good enough--only in NC) :)

I called the office of vital statistics in Raleigh to find out more information. After holding for what seemed like hours, I finally talked to a lady who told me what would happen. (funny thing is, this past weekend we got a letter from our adoption agency telling us the same thing)..... The courts send the adoption decree to the main office in Raleigh where it has to get processed along with all of our other paperwork. They check to make sure everything is correct and then once that happens they supposedly send us a letter saying everything is filed and we can then contact the vital stats office to get the birth certificate. They have told us that this can take 2-3 months :) The lady at vital stats told me that they have a backlog of birth certificates and that it could take a couple of months to get it, unless we come up there. So that's the plan :)

Hopefully this will help some of my NC friends who will have to go through these same ropes :)

The best piece of mail ever!

We arrived home around 6 tonight :) We had a great trip and I'll have lots more to share later. But I had to write about a great piece of mail that arrived while we were in FL. Without further ado...... THE ADOPTION DECREE!!!!!! Woohoo! To say we are excited is an understatement. Garrett is officially our's and we couldn't be any happier. Now to file for a social security card and call to expedite the birth certificate!

I also need some party ideas! We've always said we wanted to have a big party when everything went through the courts to celebrate him joining our family. Let me know what you can think of!

1 week

I can't believe little Garrett is already one week old. It doesn't feel like it. He's continuing to do well and he's been a pretty good eater and sleeper. He has a little fussy period but other than that, he seems to be doing really well. He went to his first doctor's appointment on Monday and she was impressed with how much he's eating (3-4 ounces) and said he looks great. He weighed the exact same as when he was born and she said that was great since they loose 8-10 percent of their body weight after birth. We decided on just letting him sleep and not waking him up to feed. He's pretty consistent and wakes every 3-4 hours. The doctor said that was great. The only problem we've had is with diapers. He was wearing pampers and huggies pure and natural but he was having major leakage issues. We've switched to little snugglers and so far they seem to be working better.

We got an email today from our social worker and she said that his birthmom is doing well and is very happy and at peace with her decision. She wanted to know how we all were doing and can't wait to see his first pictures. Everything becomes official at midnight tomorrow night (Thursday). I've done really well with this wait but I'll be glad when it's over. We registered at Target and babies r us and everyone is excited about giving us showers :) Our church is giving us a luncheon on Sunday so that should be fun. Tommy went back to work today and so far, I think I've managed pretty well :)

Thanks again for all of your support and prayers! It has meant so much to us!

11 months

Today marks our 11th month of "officially waiting." I never would have thought we would be waiting on a little miracle to be born right now :) We always thought we'd be closer to the 2 year mark. But here we sit today, anxiously awaiting the birth of this precious little boy.

First, we want to give all glory to God for our friends in FL, who are now "officially" (and legally) parents to 2 sweet little babies! It's amazing what God has done in that situation.

Now, for our news!!! We have a DATE! The birthmother will be induced on Wednesday, the 19th. We were thrilled to find out an actual date! We won't be allowed to go into the hospital (the birthing unit) until he's born. She's scheduled for early morning. Our plan is to go a good part of the way tomorrow after work and stay with friends. Then we'll get up on Wednesday and drive the rest of the way. She wants us there ASAP because she doesn't want to bond with the baby. That makes me sad but she's been through this before and knows how to best grieve. She said she feels very confident in her decision and my social worker told me this afternoon that they all will be shocked if this doesn't go through. So that's hopeful news for us. If she doesn't have to have pain medication, she'll be able to sign the initial paperwork on Wednesday and then we'll have to wait until the next Wednesday for the final termination.

We are truly humbled at all God has done for us and we give Him all the praise. He pulls us through even when we have doubts. This was on my devotional calendar this morning: "When you accept the fact that sometimes seasons are dry and times are hard and that God is in control of both, you will discover a sense of divine refuge, because the hope then is in God and not in yourself."

Please continue to pray for the birthmom, for the baby, and for us. We want nothing more but to glorify God in all things!

Nerves

Well still no news here! However, our friends, K and D, from Florida, welcomed a baby boy and a baby girl into the world yesterday! We are so excited for them and can't wait to meet these 2 precious babies. So far everything is going well; TPR happens at 48 hours after birth in Florida. Both babies are healthy and they should be released tomorrow!

I've had a rough morning with the waiting. I think it's because we don't know anything new. We never did find out what happened at Thursday's appointment and that's driving me crazy! I think either they were too busy with getting the birthfather's rights terminated or the doctor told them nothing new. So here we sit and wait :) When I woke up this morning I told Tommy, I hope she hasn't gone into labor and didn't call anyone. He told me he didn't think that was the case, I need to be calm, God's going to take care of us. I know he's right but it's still hard with not knowing. I know God is testing and stretching my faith. When we came home I had a nap and feel better now. I know all of the prayers going up for us are helping too!

Nehemiah 8:10 "The joy of the Lord is your strength." Please continue to pray for us as we wait this out!

Due date

Well today is the baby's due date. I'm not sure if he's planning on coming today or not :) Tommy hopes so because my birthday is February 12, and his is March 12. My mom's hoping he holds out until Friday because that's her birthday.

I'm going back to work today, after 2 snow days. I'm glad I'll have something to keep my mind occupied. We're on a 2 hour delay so I was able to sleep in a bit. Our social worker emailed yesterday afternoon and said everything is good. The birthmom is feeling well but she's getting impatient on waiting for the baby; she's ready to have him. She wasn't able to go to her appointment on Monday because her doctor's office was closed.

So for now, we're just in wait mode.....and praying, really hard!

Things are still good

So far everything still looks good. We are not going to be meeting with the birthmother before the birth of the baby because of the time crunch. I kind of hate that we don't get to meet with her but I know it will all work out. I guess we may meet her in the hospital, I know that's going to be awkward but I think it would be any other way too. The birth parent counselor will call our social worker when she goes into labor and then we'll start the drive to go there. We'll have about a five hour trip. If nothing happens over the weekend, she has a doctor's appointment on Monday. Her actual due date is on Wednesday.

The one thing that's still up in the air is the birthfather. The birth parent counselor hasn't been able to get into contact with him for him to consent to the adoption or to contest it. Our social worker said that in most cases they don't come back but they really can't guarantee that. They didn't have an ongoing relationship so that's where that thought is coming from. If he doesn't come forward before the baby is born, she told us it would probably take at least 6 months to terminate his rights. That really scares me but again I honestly feel like God has us here for a reason. If he does come back and want the baby, we just will have to know that we were put in this situation to care for him during that time. You can't let fear take over or you'll have regrets.

My verse on my devotional calendar was this: "By faith Abraham...obeyed and went, even though he did not know where he was going." Hebrews 11:8

We appreciate all of your prayers!

The day after the call

Thank you all for your sweet words and comments! I still think we're in shock and it all feels so surreal. It's so weird, I never thought it would feel like this. I think there are just so many things going on that it's hard for my mind to comprehend it all.

The big, "scary" point if you will in all of this is that the birthfather is not in the picture. The agency is trying to make contact with him to get him to consent to the adoption. If that doesn't happen then we'll have to follow the legal route to get his rights terminated. So basically we're looking at a "legal risk" of a few weeks to several months. Unless, he comes forward now and terminates his rights---that's what we're praying for. If not, we feel at this point, we just take the risk, fully believing that God has us here for a reason.

My social worker said today that things are still going well and that the family is all in agreement with the adoption plan. She said she was playing phone tag with the birthparent social worker and that she expected to talk with her tomorrow. Hopefully we'll have some more news by then.

So now the big questions have hit like, our insurance and finding a pediatrician. I honestly hadn't even thought about that stuff. Tommy's checking on the insurance side of things and should find out something tomorrow. I'm meeting with the lady who is in charge of payroll at my school and will find out tomorrow how we can work things out. Then we'll be calling to set up the pediatrician. We also have to buy a car seat but we're waiting until the weekend to see if it looks like things are still on go---I guess for so long it's been "no" or "negative" that we are just scared.

The one thing I am thankful for is one of the first meetings we had with our agency and they had a panel of adoptive parents and birthparents. I remember one lady who had a story similar to our's that said-treat all of this as if you were pregnant. You don't want to look back and regret that you didn't do something or weren't excited. She also said to set up the nursery so things would seem more real. At first we weren't going to set up the nursery but then decided to and I'm so glad that we have the big furniture in there now. I would be in a tizzy if I had to run around and do that now too.

I think that's it for now. I'm exhausted! I know I need to try to get some rest because this might be some of the last good rest I get for a while :) Thanks for praying for us and know that we are praying for all of you as well!

Is this really happening?

I have wanted to post this all day and went back and forth as to whether I should or not. But I decided to go with it since this is part of the process.

We got "the call" today. I can't even begin to put into words how I feel. Shocked, amazed, humbled, scared, what do we do next etc. There's a lot that I don't want to "put out there" just yet but I would truly appreciate your prayers as we wait.

The biggest shock, the birthmom is due next week!?! Oh and I almost forgot, it's a boy. We're just praying that God's will be done; we know He has us here for a reason, no matter what her decision is.

10 months

We hit the 10th month of waiting on Friday. Really, in most ways, it doesn't feel like we've been waiting that long. But when I look back, it seems like it's been forever ago since we started the process. I had a rough week last week. I don't know if it was because of the potential situation that my friend told me about (we've heard nothing) or just that time of getting closer to the holidays. I can't wait for the day when we have a child to share in the joy of this season. I mean let's face it, it's great to see and hear kids talk about this time of the year.

I had to get myself together though and get my focus back. I know God is protecting us and He'll bring the perfect situation to us. Tommy and I were talking and we both said it's better to be "just waiting" than to have to go through a failed match or placement. We emailed our social worker this week too and she said they have been busy but that a lot of expectant mothers have changed their minds at the last minute. She said the birthparent counselor in Raleigh was pretty discouraged. We're just continuing to pray that God will bring these women to our agency and will work in them-no matter what they decide; we want them to know and have a relationship with Him above all else. So after I spent some time in prayer and had some nice chats with my wonderful husband, I'm back on track. I can't wait to see how God is going to use us this upcoming year.

We've had a pretty busy weekend but we've also had lots of fun. We went with some friends to a place about an hour away from here called Mike's farm. It started out as a Christmas tree farm but now they have a restaurant, bakery, and hayrides. There's always a really long wait to eat so we went up early and got our names on the list. While we waited, we decided to go for the hayride. They go through the tree farm and it's all decorated with lights. They play music as you go through and in one part it snows on you (probably the closest thing we'll see to snow) :) We had a great time and have decided that will be our yearly tradition. We also had a Christmas party last night with Tommy's family and some close friends. We had a great time and laughed so much that our stomachs hurt!

We finished up our shopping yesterday and we're ready! I love giving gifts to others and I'm excited about giving our parents their gifts. I'm also very excited that I don't have to wake up early this week or next!

I almost forgot to add....I lost 1.2 pounds this week (WOOHOO!) and (are you ready for this)..met my 10% goal! I'm ready to tackle this holiday eating season :)

Need a Christmas gift idea?

Well I have one for you! Kari and her husband are also adopting domestically. They have been matched with an expectant mom and are trying to raise funds to bring home their baby. They have these great cookbooks that they are selling to try and raise the funds they need. So not only can you knock out a Christmas gift, you can also help a waiting family! I bought one and there are some great recipes in there! Check out her post here for more information!

Hope you all are having a great day!

I need your help!

We received an email from our social worker today giving us a little bit of encouragement. She said they have had quite a few placements lately so that's good news. Hopefully we'll hear something soon.

I need your help though! The more I get into all of this, the more I see how many people hold fundraisers to help with their adoption costs. So, my questions....for those of you not doing this (even if you aren't adopting) what do you think about it? For those of you fundraising now, what do you think about it? What are some of the best ones to do? How did you get involved doing it?

We both have super supportive family and friends so I'm pretty sure most would back us. I guess I just wonder if people will question us for doing it.

I'd love to have your thoughts about it though.

Positive thinking

Tommy and I had the privilege of attending a dinner auction benefit for cystic fibrosis last night. It was a lot of fun. Tommy ended up with two fishing poles by the time the night was over :) One will be an early birthday present for my dad.

One of my student's has cystic fibrosis and I never really knew much about it until her mom came in to talk to us. It's a pretty scary and serious disease that affects so many children. One of the men who spoke last night was very encouraging in his words. He was diagnosed with CF at age 2 and had a double lung transplant 20 years ago. He is the longest living survivor of a double lung transplant. Anyways, during his speech, he said his parents were always positive. He said he never knew how to think any other way. He said of course he was nervous when the time came for transplant but he just thought to himself, this will work. He said the best advice he can give is to think positive and believe in impossibilities.

Those few words rang so true in so many areas of our lives. My heart hurts for people going through diseases, cancer, and then of course IF. When I look back now, I see how IF has changed us and while we didn't know it before, it has changed us for the good. We started this process almost 4 years ago, so I've been there. I've cried over those negative pregnancy tests, mourned the loss of our babies, and felt frustrated when all seemed out of control. Almost 2 years ago (next Saturday), we transferred our last frozen embryo. It didn't work and it was after that time that we felt God pulling us in another direction. We knew we couldn't go through more treatments.

There are many people around us right now that are pregnant. I am truly excited for them but I hope they bask in the blessing that God has given them. I think so many people take that for granted. See the last post for more on that!

This week has been a good one. I have received many notes, emails, calls etc from friends and family just to let us know that they were praying for us and thinking about us. That gives me hope and keeps us going on this journey.

Just an update about our hairdresser's friends in the car accident. The husband is still in ICU; they had to remove half of his skull because of the swelling in the brain. They are not sure yet how much brain damage there is. He still doesn't know that his wife is gone. Please continue to pray for their families.

Tomorrow we have our much anticipated, long awaited, trip to try indoor skydiving with my best friend. I can't wait to try it out!